Tax Time

Discussion in 'Off-topic' started by phantoms, Jan 9, 2011.

  1. phantoms

    phantoms Senior Mumbler

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    I'm sure this (or something similar) has been posted in the past, but with tax time coming around again it's time for a repost.

    The Tax Poem

    Tax his land, Tax his bed,Tax the table at which he's fed.

    Tax his tractor, Tax his mule, Teach him taxes Are the rule.

    Tax his work, Tax his pay, He works for peanuts Anyway!

    Tax his cow, Tax his goat, Tax his pants, Tax his coat.

    Tax his ties, Tax his shirt, Tax his work, Tax his dirt.

    Tax his tobacco, Tax his drink, Tax him if he Tries to think.

    Tax his cigars, Tax his beers, If he cries Tax his tears.

    Tax his car, Tax his gas, Find other ways To tax his ass.

    Tax all he has Then let him know That you won't be done Till he has no dough.

    When he screams and hollers, Then tax him some more, Tax him till
    He's good and sore.

    Then tax his coffin, Tax his grave, Tax the sod in Which he's laid.

    Put these words Upon his tomb, "Taxes drove me to my doom..."

    When he's gone, Do not relax, Its time to apply The inheritance tax.

    Accounts Receivable Tax
    Building Permit Tax
    CDL license Tax
    Cigarette Tax
    Corporate Income Tax
    Dog License Tax
    Excise Taxes
    Federal Income Tax
    Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
    Fishing License Tax
    Food License Tax
    Fuel Permit Tax
    Gasoline Tax (2005 avg. 45.90 cents per gallon)
    Gross Receipts Tax
    Hunting License Tax
    Inheritance Tax
    Inventory Tax
    IRS Interest Charges IRS Penalties (tax on top of tax)
    Liquor Tax
    Luxury Taxes
    Marriage License Tax
    Medicare Tax
    Personal Property Tax
    Property Tax
    Real Estate Tax
    Service Charge Tax
    Social Security Tax
    Road Usage Tax
    Sales Tax
    Recreational Vehicle Tax
    School Tax
    State Income Tax
    State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
    Telephone Federal Excise Tax
    Telephone Federal Universal Service Fee Tax
    Telephone Federal, State and Local Surcharge Taxes
    Telephone Minimum Usage Surcharge Tax
    Telephone Recurring and Non-recurring Charges Tax
    Telephone State and Local Tax
    Telephone Usage Charge Tax
    Utility Taxes
    Vehicle License Registration Tax
    Vehicle Sales Tax
    Watercraft Registration Tax
    Well Permit Tax
    Workers Compensation Tax





    STILL THINK THIS IS FUNNY?

    Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago, and our nation was the most prosperous in the world.

    We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest middleclass in the world, and Mom stayed home to raise the kids.

    What in the hell happened? Can you spell "politicians?"

    And I still have to "press 1" for English!?!?!?!?
     

  2. Hock25

    Hock25 New Member

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    I think "politicians" may be oversimplifying it, whereas "meddlers" could be more specific. Politicians always want to meddle in affairs, but there are others prone to controlling or being controlled, and feel uncomfortable if there is a lack of control over the population.

    Take any dog park or dog beach in any town, for an example. What is a dog park or dog beach? It starts as a place where people regularly walk their dogs. Then, regulars allow their dogs to interact, off leash. Suddenly, meddlers who don't understand how a dog can be "controlled" off leash demand a fence. Fences cost money. Money comes from taxes. Now there's a parcel with a fence. Not everyone has control over their dog off leash, so a sally-port style gate must be built, which costs money. Poop, water and mud runoff, insurance, and now you have a beast which must be fed. Dogs want to run in a tight area where the other dogs are, and have their owners nearby for security. Dogs in tight areas make the controlling types uneasy, so they seek to expand the park's dimensions. More fencing and gates and upkeep, more money, and now the tax burden is aggregious. The dogs continue to run and play in a forty yard diameter circle, while the self-important dog park committee pats themselves on the back about the four acres of unused space. The controllers seek to maintain control by instituting a "user fee," which allows unfettered growth and access, and "thermal runaway" of the park. Having water spigots every thirty yards isn't enough, so now, the controllers talk of ceiling fans in the gazebos inside the "dog" park. Ceiling fans require electricity...
     
  3. Bobo

    Bobo New Member

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    Politicians, lawyers (become politicians/lobbyists), big corporations, welfare abusers (the majority), medicade abusers (the majority)...all of that is raping the working man.
     
  4. Hock25

    Hock25 New Member

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    Coffeemate, please cue the video! :)
     
  5. Bobo

    Bobo New Member

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    I'm ready for movie time.
     
  6. Hock25

    Hock25 New Member

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    Maybe Coffeemate is stuck in the snow, so just in case:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ru6r3v5v ... re=related