Running Double-Dog Slow

Discussion in 'Website & Forum Suggestions' started by CoffeeMate, Aug 15, 2016.

  1. CoffeeMate

    CoffeeMate Junior Butt Warmer

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    :panic:


    I already tried moving my printer, re-installing all my fonts, and signing up with a new electric company.
     
  2. Nemo

    Nemo Man of Myth and Legend

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    You need to get up in the bottom, back corner and drain out the excess intelligence that is all used up. It only has storage for so much but that gets over filled and mucks everything up. Kinda hard to find and its a small screw that comes out, but find it. Take it out for an hour or so and it will all evaporate and leave, making things right.

    If it does not speed up, it needs to be left open longer to evaporate more.

    Nemo
     

  3. CoffeeMate

    CoffeeMate Junior Butt Warmer

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    Which hole in the top do I pour the oil into?
     
  4. mark5019

    mark5019 what me worry?

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    like 50 weight oil in -50 degree temps
     
  5. CoffeeMate

    CoffeeMate Junior Butt Warmer

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    So I need to put it into the freezer too?
     
  6. Nemo

    Nemo Man of Myth and Legend

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    No No No. If its one of the newer computers running the fancy new turbo type chips (if under 5 years old it is) give the best you can. Keep it really running proper. Shell 15W-40 Rotella. Go with the good stuff. You won't regret it.

    But the freezer part is correct. You remember way back when computers were really big. As in whole room big? That was because they had their own freezers built into the middle of them to make them work proper.

    Nemo
     
  7. Phil1979

    Phil1979 Member Georgia Carry

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    Did you reboot multiple times without saving your work? Have you tried moving your desk?
     
  8. Nemo

    Nemo Man of Myth and Legend

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    Thinking about it, that could be the main problem. His computer and the electro-magnetics it uses are not aligned with the ones on the earth. He needs to get his compass involved and get the N/S-- E/W meridians lined up proper.

    With the magnetic hard drives and all the proper line up can be a major disaster if you get off the X and Y axes of orientation.

    These new computers can be bears to get working proper sometimes.

    Nemo
     
  9. Phil1979

    Phil1979 Member Georgia Carry

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    Feng shui might be better to try first. That science stuff is just too much voodoo for me.


     
  10. jsaund22

    jsaund22 Ninjaneering Computers

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    I got a lot of database errors earlier this afternoon - I just gave up for a while.
     
  11. MewsicLovr

    MewsicLovr Member

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    Same here. Had issues just trying make this post to say I was getting db errors.
     
  12. CoffeeMate

    CoffeeMate Junior Butt Warmer

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    I moved my desk and machine into the freezer, but now the compass won't work.

    Also, no matter how much oil I keeping putting in the top, it still continues to ooze out the bottom. Do I need to use injector cleaner or something?
     
  13. CoffeeMate

    CoffeeMate Junior Butt Warmer

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    That seemed to work for about five or ten minutes, then it all oozed out the bottom again.
     
  14. mark5019

    mark5019 what me worry?

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    still slow responses
     
  15. moe mensale

    moe mensale Well-Known Member

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    My dad died in 1999. He's currently moving faster than this website is!
     
  16. UtiPossidetis

    UtiPossidetis American

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    Perhaps folks should call Windows Support?
     
  17. mark5019

    mark5019 what me worry?

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    Windows support won't fix it
     
  18. Malum Prohibitum

    Malum Prohibitum Moderator Staff Member

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  19. mark5019

    mark5019 what me worry?

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    Yes back to normal
     
  20. moe mensale

    moe mensale Well-Known Member

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    Much better but I still can't really log out. :confused: