Newlyweds

Discussion in 'Off-topic' started by Adam5, Oct 25, 2007.

  1. Adam5

    Adam5 Atlanta Overwatch

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    A couple had only been married for two weeks and the
    >> >husband although very much in love, couldn't wait to go
    >> >out on the town and party with his old buddies.
    >> >
    >> >
    >> >So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
    >> >
    >> >
    >> >"Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.
    >> >
    >> >
    >> >"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face," he answered. I'm
    >> >going to have a few beers with the guys.
    >> >
    >> >
    >> >The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the
    >> >door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds
    >> >of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany ,
    >> > Holland , Japan , India , etc.
    >> >
    >> >
    >> >The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing
    >> >that he could think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop... but
    >> >at the bar... You know...they have frozen glasses... "
    >> >
    >> >
    >> >He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife
    >> >interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy
    >> >Face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so
    >> >frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
    >> >
    >> >
    >> >The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll,
    >> >but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are
    >> >really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be right back. I
    >> >promise. OK?"
    >> >
    >> >
    >> >"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the
    >> >oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres:
    >> >chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and little
    >> >quiches.
    >> >
    >> >
    >> >"But my sweet honey... at the bar.... you know there's
    >> >swearing, dirty words and all that..."
    >> >
    >> >
    >> >"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP CHICKEN SH*T!
    >> >SIT YOUR A** DOWN, SHUT THE :censored: UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN
    >> >YOUR FROZEN MUG AND > EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR
    >> >MARRIED A** ISN'T GOING TO A DAMNED BAR! THAT S**T IS
    >> >OVER, GOT IT, JACKA**?"

    And they lived happily ever after.
     
  2. cripple

    cripple New Member

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    good one for wsweeks2.... :D
     

  3. budder

    budder Moderator Staff Member

    If you run it through ClipCase, you get something a little prettier ;) :

    A couple had only been married for two weeks and the
    husband although very much in love, couldn't wait to go
    out on the town and party with his old buddies.
    So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
    "Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.
    "I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face," he answered. I'm
    going to have a few beers with the guys.
    The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the
    door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds
    of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany ,
    Holland , Japan , India , etc.
    The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing
    that he could think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop... but
    at the bar... You know...they have frozen glasses... "
    He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife
    interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy
    Face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so
    frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
    The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll,
    but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are
    really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be right back. I
    promise. OK?"
    "You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the
    oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres:
    chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and little
    quiches.
    "But my sweet honey... at the bar.... you know there's
    swearing, dirty words and all that..."
    "You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP CHICKEN SH*T!
    SIT YOUR A** DOWN, SHUT THE Censored UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN
    YOUR FROZEN MUG AND > EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR
    MARRIED A** ISN'T GOING TO A DAMNED BAR! THAT S**T IS
    OVER, GOT IT, JACKA**?"
    And they lived happily ever after.
     
  4. wsweeks2

    wsweeks2 New Member

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    Thanks for remembering. The mother-in-law-to-be got here last night. She's already worn out her welcome. She didn't like the one target I had in the garage that was from the range last week. I told her that the hotel down the street doesn't have guns in every room if she would feel safer there.
     
  5. triggerman357

    triggerman357 Active Member

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    Welcome to my world :whistle:
     
  6. cripple

    cripple New Member

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    dang man...make her clean your gun...seriously though good luck with everything.
     
  7. merlock

    merlock Active Member

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    :lol:
     
  8. GunNut

    GunNut New Member

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    Be sure to OC around the house. :D
     
  9. Sharky

    Sharky Active Member

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    Oh boy...............this should be an interesting set of events! Just have your soon to be wife tell her about your little tift downtown at that fast food place! And how now she is a bit more understanding that you were prepared and able to protect your family!

    you'd think she would be impressed by the grouping of the target (yes old wsweeks is a pretty good shot :wink: ). But you know how moms can be.
     
  10. GunNut

    GunNut New Member

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    Get some of those fake bullet hole stickers and put them on the window too high up for her to touch and then tell her it was a drive-by. Maybe let off a string of firecrackers. :D
     
  11. USMC - Retired

    USMC - Retired Active Member

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    Maybe she didn't like it because your shots were all over the place. Perhaps she would feel safer if you could tighten up your groups...
     
  12. M249

    M249 New Member

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    :lol:
     
  13. tace

    tace New Member

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    My mother is coming to stay with us for 3 weeks. She doesn't understand about or like guns the least.

    My wife was like "3 WEEEKKKSS!!!????!!!" :shock: She said "I can't even stand my best friend for 3 weeks under the same roof, but your MOM???"

    I guess I'll be working late quite a few days ;)
     
  14. cripple

    cripple New Member

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    ...more range time... :D
     
  15. GeorgiaGlocker

    GeorgiaGlocker Romans 10:13

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    Isn't love wonderful.......I can remember when the couple down the street actually liked each other.
     
  16. wsweeks2

    wsweeks2 New Member

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    Well, I haven't been able to post pictures recently, but I did find a way to get this one on here. As I mentioned before, I got my 226 back from MD last month, and I know why I missed it. In this picture, it is 31 rounds at 15 yards fired in about 15-20 seconds. If only I could shoot this well if/when the SHTF.

    [​IMG]
     
  17. budder

    budder Moderator Staff Member

    Nice shooting! Make sure the MIL gets a chance to praise your skills ;)
     
  18. fallison

    fallison Guest

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    I'd have that hanging on the wall too. (Except I would probably have it framed and hanging in the living room.) :D