Girlfriend and Firearms

Discussion in 'Off-topic' started by EmTea, Oct 17, 2010.

  1. EmTea

    EmTea New Member

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    So I don't really know how to approach this so here it goes.

    I've been into guns most of my life, I'm not a hunter (don't have anything against it and I want to go, but just never had the opportunity) I just enjoy them and like to shoot. I do also believe that it's every responsible citizens right to own firearms and protect their loved ones and property from harm. I'd like to think I'm not a crazy person, but I know some one out there would disagree.

    I've been dating my girlfriend for almost 4 years now, we met our senior year in high school and have been dating ever sense. I've gotten more into guns in the past couple of years but it's something that she knew I had an interest in. She has no problems with guns, she believes that we have the right to own them and protect out selves with them. However she doesn't see it the way that I do, or the way that others here would. She's against me getting a GWL and carrying concealed around her and she gets uncomfortable when she comes over to my place because I keep a loaded gun by the bed. She's grown up around guns, her grandfather hunted, as did her dad and she tells me she shot a gun before. But it's like she gets nervous around my guns even when they're unloaded and hidden away.

    I think that she just doesn't understand how safe guns are, and that unless it's a highly tampered with or antique gun, they cannot just go off without the pull of a trigger. (For reference, I have a Remington 870, AR-15, and Sig SP2022). I'd like to take her to the range and show her but she never wants to go. I'd also like to make note that this isn't a deal breaker, it's not like we're about go to splitsville because of this, I just wish she'd be more comfortable with it all.

    I'm sure you guys have been in similar situations and I wanted to get your advice.

    As far as the GWL goes, I've tried to tell her about protecting my self and her but she doesn't seem to buy it. I think she grew up in a "gun safe" house, were all the guns were stored away in a locked "safe" (read: display case) at all times and sometimes her dad would keep a .22 revolver in his sock drawer and a slap jack in the night stand. I've tried not to force the issue, and anytime my friends go to the range I invite her but never pressure her to do it. But eventually something is going to happen because I plan on getting my GWL and I plan on carrying in the near future. I'd much rather me tell her I'm carrying then her to find out on her own.

    If you have any questions let me know, and mods feel free to move this. I wasn't really sure where it should go.
     
  2. samman23

    samman23 New Member

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    women are complicated. good luck! :righton:
     

  3. EmTea

    EmTea New Member

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    Yeah I quickly figured that out after two years or so.

    This really isn't that big of a deal between the two of us, and it's not like I want her to become some gun nut who wants to go to the range every weekend simply because that's not her. I just want her to be more comfortable with them when she's around me.

    I hope that makes sense.
     
  4. Quest50

    Quest50 Active Member

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    And I thought I had it rough....
     
  5. suttree

    suttree New Member

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    It sounds like you think that she might eventually make you choose between her or carrying. I have been given the me or 'insert your hobby here' choice before. Unless you plan on marrying this girl and raising a family soon, I'd choose the gun. Seriously.

    Even then you might regret it in time.
     
  6. vanguard

    vanguard New Member

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    I wonder how she would feel if you were say in a store that was being robbed and the bad guy was high and shot the clerk then saw you on the way out and shot you, but you could not carry because she did not like guns. :?
     
  7. Get your license, and carry concealed when you two are out on a date. Get a friend, that she doesn't know, to attempt to mug you while on a date night, you draw your weapon on him and have him cower and flee. Just make sure you don't shoot your friend.

    Two things can happen.

    1. She changes her views on guns and you carrying because she'll realize how that carrying allowed you to protect her.

    2. She becomes angry that you "kept a secret" from her and she won't listen to you when you try to explain how you protected her.

    It'd be unlikely that she'd remain neutral, it'll probably be one of the extremes like above.

    Edit: This is a joke, do not take this seriously. While it would be a method that would work, it's not meant to seriously be done unless EmTea and his friend have a very close trust and friendship.
     
  8. EmTea

    EmTea New Member

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    While I understand where you're coming from, I don't think it'd come to that. She may not like it but I'll still keep a loaded gun with me around my place.

    It's funny you should say that, once while we were leaving a shopping center my car wouldn't shift from park to drive. I got out of the car to check out what might be going on. Well this crazy homeless guy came over and tried to help, I tried to tell him that I could call a tow truck if I needed to but he wouldn't leave. He reached inside the car, over her, and tried to fix something. I did my best to get him to leave but since I was unarmed, and I'm not what you'd call a fist fighting type guy, I was afraid of pushing him too far and learn that he was armed the hard way. I'm sure there are a dozen more ways I could of handled it better than that, but that's what happened. I'm not saying I would of pulled a gun on him, or that I even wanted too, but I would of had a little more confidence to deal with the situation then just be a victim.

    CT- I don't know if I'd feel comfortable doing that to my friend.
     
  9. I can empathize there, I'd feel uncomfortable pointing a loaded gun at any of my friends. Just a joking, yet truthful, suggestion if you really wanted to find out how she'd react to you carrying.
     
  10. EmTea

    EmTea New Member

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    Yeah I kinda figured you were joking, but I did see your point.
     
  11. AuburnRunner

    AuburnRunner New Member

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    I actually like Tyrant's suggestion... just please make sure you're in a VERY rural setting so some bystanders don't call the cops and turn it into a situation that both you and your GF will remember in a bad light...
     
  12. AV8R

    AV8R Banned

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    Toss her out on her ass. :?
     
  13. MyFred

    MyFred Banned

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    AV8R, you kinda' hard on this issue, but you're not far from being right. I've had my carry permit ever since they were allowed. I only started carrying all the time about five years ago due to some trouble the wife's punk ass wanta' be gansta' son got into to. After a while, my wife asked me not to carry around the house and the boys cause it made her nervous. Then one day she got a phone call from a drug dealer in reference to her punk ass son. She hung up on them and brought me my gun to carry forever. Now she has her carry permit and carries all the time like me. I love my wife. I'm sure the OP loves his girl. I just hope that she comes around before either of them get hurt or else their lives may be ruined anyway just because she was not comfortable with him wanting them both to be safe!!!
     
  14. Suburbbus

    Suburbbus Well-Known Member

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    My wife is Canadian and was never around guns at all. Once our daughter was old enough to understand to leave it alone except when me and daughter went to range to shoot, she finally agree to have a gun in house. After I got my GFL (in the past) and started carrying, she eventually got used to it and does not even think about the fact that I carry now.

    Get your GWL and conceal around her for a while. Once you get comfortable carrying around her, give it a little while and then let her know what has been going on. She will probably either be ok with it or you will know for sure how she really feels about you carrying and then you must make a personal decision to carry while with her or not to.

    This has come up a couple of times involving either a spouse or a girlfriend. Usually this it the advice that is given if I remember correctly.
     
  15. Quest50

    Quest50 Active Member

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  16. EmTea

    EmTea New Member

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    I'll take this into consideration. I know I'm going to carry but most of my time is either at school, where I can't carry (yet), or with her. I'm also thinking about asking her to come with the range to me again, but let her know that if she ever feels uncomfortable I'll turn the car around that second. And that I won't care if that's after she shot one round or as soon as we pull up to the range.

    While I appreciate the suggestion I think this might turn her off about it all. I'd rather not scare her into thinking that guns are ok. I'd rather just show her, ya know?
     
  17. Quest50

    Quest50 Active Member

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    Different people react differently, It was very convincing for my girlfriend.
     
  18. MyFred

    MyFred Banned

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    I'm beginning to think that AV8R may be 100% correct. Find someone that you match with instead of trying to match with someone that you don't. You will be much happier in the long run. Best of luck to ya!!!
     
  19. Quest50

    Quest50 Active Member

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    I disagree. Why can't EmTea have his cake and eat it too? If he can change her mind and show her why she's being illogical, then there's no reason for him to dump her.
     
  20. XshootX

    XshootX New Member

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    Do what you want and let the chips fall where they may. Don't ask her opinion about it unless you care about the answer. Carry to protect yourself and those you love. There are more fish in the sea than you realize in your early 20s.