An 87 year old man went to his doctor for a physical examination. While there, the doctor handed him a bottle and told him he would need a semen sample when he came in for his next visit - which was 2 weeks from that day.
Two weeks went buy, and the 87 year old man went back to see his doctor for the follow up appointment. He handed the doctor the bottle, which was empty. the doctor looked at him confused.
"Doc ... I am 87 years old. I tried with my right hand. When that didn't work, I tried with my left hand. My wife tried with her right hand, then her left hand .. then both hands. She tried with her teeth in, she tried with her teeth out .. but neither of us can get that dang bottle open."