Cliff notes on understanding women's vocabulary

Discussion in 'Off-topic' started by AV8R, Sep 8, 2007.

  1. AV8R

    AV8R Banned

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    1. Fine : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

    2. Five Minutes : If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

    3. Nothing : This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

    4. Go Ahead : This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

    5. Loud Sigh : This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

    6. That's Okay : This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

    7. Thanks : A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome.

    8 . Whatever : Is a woman's way of saying "FORGET YOU!!!"

    9. Don't worry about it, I got it : Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do
    several times, but is now doing it herself.. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?" For the woman's response refer to #3.
     
  2. Thorsen

    Thorsen New Member

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    So true. I love my wife, but I will never understand women.
     

  3. Jmark

    Jmark Active Member

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    A lot of truth there.
     
  4. tony218

    tony218 New Member

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    after 23 yrs. of being married i've learned 2 very important words:
    YES DEAR
     
  5. merlock

    merlock Active Member

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    :lol: +1

    How true... :!:
     
  6. wsweeks2

    wsweeks2 New Member

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    Yeah, I'm working on that one. We have an agreeement now - as long as it doesn't have to do with guns, there is room for compromise.

    I think that's more than fair. Like I told her, I'll be more than happy to keep us both alive so that I cay say "yes dear" for many years to come.
     
  7. Macktee

    Macktee New Member

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    KID!

    I've been trying for 43 years to understand my wife and I'm no closer now than I was when we got married.

    I told my son-in-law to be the secret of a happy marriage was those two words.

    He said his dad told him the same thing...

    We'll never win!


    I had a guy tell me once his wife controlled 90% of the money and 100% of the sex.

    I replied. in complete astonishment, "How do you get 10% of the money???"
     
  8. merlock

    merlock Active Member

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    :lol:
     
  9. tace

    tace New Member

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    I am in my second marriage after 10 years with the first one. I learned a thing or two that helps me along the way. Here are some of my principles that get me through the day.

    1. Women are insane, no reason can work when dealing with them.
    2. It's easier to ask for forgiveness then permission. Especially if you have in hand one of their vices (chocolate, Coach bags, diamonds, whatever works..)
    3. Arguing with them is a futile attempt, see number 1.
    4. If you have kids, you have surroundered ALL of your rights. Now on, you are her bitch, she is your GOD.
    5. If she isn't working, she is contemplating how to make your life more miserable when you get home. If you get a divorce, she can keep on not working and you will still pay, dearly.
     
  10. GeorgiaGlocker

    GeorgiaGlocker Romans 10:13

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    Yeah, I get the last two words in at the end of every discussion.....Yes Honey!