Are You a Democrat, Republican, or Southerner?

Discussion in 'Off-topic' started by S&W 40, Feb 21, 2007.

  1. S&W 40

    S&W 40 Active Member

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    A friend sent this to me, thought some may get a laugh.


    Here is a little test that will help you decide.

    The answer can be found by your response to the following situation:

    You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
    children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around
    the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah,
    raises the knife, and charges at you.

    You are carrying a Glock 40-caliber, and you are an expert shot.

    You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

    What do you do?

    --------------------------------------------------------------------

    Democrat's Answer:

    Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

    Does the man look poor? Or oppressed?

    Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

    Could we run away?

    What does my wife think?

    What about the kids?

    Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

    What does the law say about this situation?

    What do the European courts say about this situation?

    Does the Glock have appropriate safety built into it?

    Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does
    this send to society and to my children?

    Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

    Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

    If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

    Should I call 9-1-1?

    Why is this street so deserted?

    We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a
    happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

    This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for
    few a days and try to come to a consensus.

    .....................................................

    Republican's Answer:

    BANG!

    .................................................

    Southerner's Answer:

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.....

    (sounds of reloading).

    BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click

    Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?

    Son: Can I shoot the next one?

    Wife: You ain't taking that to the Taxidermist!
     
  2. BergerBoy

    BergerBoy New Member

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    :lol:
     

  3. RIPNITZ

    RIPNITZ New Member

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    Bwahahaha, now that was great! And so true! :lol:
     
  4. Foul

    Foul New Member

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    <------ Southern by the grace of God. :twisted:
     
  5. tony218

    tony218 New Member

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    i said this the first time this appeared on this board.

    i can't see any self respecting southerner with a gun that
    only holds 9 shots.
     
  6. Rammstein

    Rammstein New Member

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    Not even a 1911? :wink:
     
  7. tony218

    tony218 New Member

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    you know all true southerners carry glocks
     
  8. GeorgiaGlocker

    GeorgiaGlocker Romans 1:16

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    :D
     
  9. USMC - Retired

    USMC - Retired New Member

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    Give me a break! Real guns are made of metal! Never catch me with a Plastic Spasmatic! The only guns that should be made of plastic are translucent bright colors and are loaded with a garden hose! :lol:
     
  10. ber950

    ber950 Active Member

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    :shock:

    Heresy. Burn em. :twisted:
     
  11. Adam5

    Adam5 Atlanta Overwatch

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    I'm right there with ya!!!! :twisted:

    But what about when the wife opens fire too ?
     
  12. glockgirl

    glockgirl New Member

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    took the words right out of my mouth!
     
  13. Adam5

    Adam5 Atlanta Overwatch

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    It fails to mention the child popping the guy in the a** with a pellet gun.
     
  14. tony218

    tony218 New Member

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    this was aimed at the glock people on the board
    i personally carry a smith&wesson m&p9mm.
    an american made gun :lol: :lol:
     
  15. Macktee

    Macktee New Member

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    Born in Kentucky, the most northern of the southern states, living in Georgia.

    Guess I'm a southerner. Y'all...
     
  16. gunsbillygun

    gunsbillygun New Member

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    southern all the way, besides you know he has his shotgun in the truck plus the wife is caring what southern women wouldn't be, the kids each have there own, and the boys down at the waffle house all have guns and his back. welcome to the south boys.
     
  17. jason1

    jason1 New Member

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    The Southerners will always take care of business but the tree huging Yankee will hide in the corner of the room when SHT hits the fan.Go home Yankee back to NYC with the nut you call a mayor were there is almost a gun ban plus a high crime rate.Yankees say there safe in gun free NYC no one will rob me because its illegal to have a gun on the streets of New York and if I do get robbed then I can call a cop to chase the guy down.But the robber didn't read or care about law that says he can not have a gun in NYC.
    Bang,BANG Southerners will always rule :lol: We always carry more weapons then you can think of.Guns,knives,Clubs,Chains,Taster Guns, ect. :lol: :lol:A true Southerner will always have a pump-action 12 gauge shotgun hanging on the back glass of the pick-up truck if his pistol jams while he's trying to kill the Terrorist He's son takes the Blackjack and hits the Terrorist over the head to make sure that he's dead. Its just called a down home southern :censored: whippin.If you ever cross a Southerner then get ready for that whippin. :wink:
     
  18. Rammstein

    Rammstein New Member

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    Born in the People's Republic of Kalifornia, but southerner by choice.
     
  19. Macktee

    Macktee New Member

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    I have to agree. A REAL Southerner would have a wife and daughter who were both packing and both would be shooting!

    And he woundn't go bang, bang, bang, etc., he'd go BOOM, BOOM!!! As he whipped out his 10 gauge coach gun...

    But, other than that, I liked the story.
     
  20. Foul

    Foul New Member

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    Yep. The wife packs a KT P11 and a Taurus .357.